Thursday, March 29, 2012

Beer Summit, Anyone?

Beer Summit, Anyone?
March 28, 2012
by Burt Prelutsky

As I sit here, it has not yet been determined what actually took place in Sanford, Florida, and whether George Zimmerman will be arrested and tried for shooting Trayvon Martin. Except for Mr. Zimmerman and his friends and family, that will be of little concern. What really matters is that America’s leading racists, Barack Obama, Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson and the Black Panthers, have all had the opportunity to showboat and to show their true colors.

For good measure, as radio talk show host Dennis Prager pointed out, for the first time in its history, the New York Times identified someone, in this case Zimmerman, as “a white Hispanic.” After all, it wouldn’t be front page news if a Hispanic had shot a black or vice versa, or, as is more typical, a black had killed a white. Only by emphasizing that Zimmerman’s father was white, while ignoring the fact that his mother was Peruvian, could the Times turn this unfortunate incident into the only kind of hate crime they really care about, one in which a white man can be portrayed as evil incarnate.

Barack Obama, just as he did when there was the incident in Cambridge, Massachusetts a few years ago, immediately jumped to a racially-based conclusion. Just as Professor Henry Gates had to be right and Sgt. James Crowley and the entire Cambridge Police Department had to be wrong before anyone actually knew the facts of the matter, we had Obama solemnly intoning, “If I had a son, he would look like Trayvon Martin.” Well, I suppose he would unless, Mother Nature being the naughty pixy she sometimes is, he came out looking like your Caucasian mother.

Just in terms of public relations, wouldn’t it have been a good idea for Obama to have spoken a few well-chosen words after the 13-year-old white kid, Allen Coon, in Kansas City, was recently doused in gasoline and set on fire while the two black teenagers hollered, “You get what you deserve, white boy!”?

Isn‘t it odd that neither Sharpton nor Jackson thought it was worth their time to fly off to Kansas City and admonish the black community to shape up, and to urge the KCPD to arrest those young sadists and send them away for a long stretch? Instead, we had Al Sharpton leading a demonstration, during which he said, and I quote, “Don’t talk to us like we stupid. Don’t talk to us like we ignit.” He garnered loud cheers from a crowd of black Floridians, who clearly speak his language, even if nobody else does. He went on to say, “We love our children like you love yours.” Well, not exactly, Reverend Al. Not when three out of four black babies are born to unmarried women.

In a related matter, people seem to be in a big rush to try, convict and execute, Sgt. Robert Bales for murdering 17 Afghans, while in the meantime, Major Hasan, who massacred 13 Americans at Fort Hood in 2009, continues to await trial nearly three years after his bloody rampage, committed in the name of Allah.

In this country, it would appear, a hate crime is simply one for which a white heterosexual is responsible, never one in which he or she is the victim.

Speaking of the racist-in-chief, Barack Obama, when he’s not chastising white policemen, actually has the gall to travel around the country to promote his energy policy. Like Sharpton, who only addresses the choir, Obama makes certain that when he describes his policy as “all of the above,” nobody in his throng ever asks him why, in that case, he has declared war on the coal industry and shut down drilling for oil both offshore and on federal land.

Why does he lower the hammer on the Keystone pipeline and its 20,000 jobs, while at the same time throwing billions of our tax dollars at green energy, an industry responsible for a mere 2.4% of the jobs in America? And why does he keep insisting that we only have 22 billion barrels of oil in reserve when the government’s own geological experts put the figure at one trillion barrels? I mean, it’s one thing to employ guesswork when it comes to handicapping a basketball tournament, but quite another matter when you use a crystal ball when estimating oil reserves and miss by 978,000,000,000 barrels!

Finally, a while back, when asked to give himself an overall grade, Obama, while trying to look modest, gave himself a B+. Recently, when asked to do the same, Secretary of Energy Steven Chu gave himself an A-.

What I want to know is where were these easy graders when I was in school?
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Fools, Nitwits & Dumb Bunnies
Monday, March 26, 2012
by Burt Prelutsky

The title refers to those politicians in our nation’s capital who make our laws, oversee our wars and conduct our foreign policy. If you regard Congress as a family, this one has far more than its share of black sheep. If you regard Congress as a village, this one has far more than its share of idiots. If, on the other hand, you regard Congress as a gathering of wise and benevolent public servants, I’m afraid you, too, are a fool, a nitwit or a very dumb bunny.

Consider, if you will, that back in the 1990s, President Clinton got North Korea to agree to cease pursuing a nuclear bomb in exchange for a load of goodies that made Santa Claus look like a piker. Naturally, we later discovered that they did not hold up their end of the bargain. Can you imagine such a thing? Who would have ever guessed that a blackmailer wouldn’t keep his word?

Now, Secretary of State Clinton is over the moon because North Korea has agreed to a temporary suspension of its nuclear tests in exchange for 240,000 metric tons of food. Notice this time around, the North Koreans got us to say “Uncle!” for nothing more than a temporary agreement they have no intention of honoring.

By this time, one would think that we knew better than to send a couple of drones named Bill and Hillary to deal with these blackguards. Armed drones would clearly have a better chance of getting their attention, not to mention their cooperation.

Will we never learn that it doesn’t pay to make nice with tyrants? In exchange for getting us to deprive Poland and the Czech Republic of a missile defense system, the Russians didn’t even have to give Obama a bottle of vodka or a dancing bear.

When it comes to diplomacy, you can’t even call people like the Clintons and Obama pigeons because it would be an affront to perfectly capable birds.

In poker circles, it’s said that you never want to play cards with guys nicknamed Doc, Fingers or the Professor. In world politics, you don’t send amateurs to negotiate with guys named Putin, Ahmadinejad or Kim Jong-Un.

In other world news, we recently learned that after Obama gave Brazil two billion dollars to develop its offshore oil industry, in which George Soros just happens to have a major stake, the Brazilians are selling their oil to China. So we can add a woman, Brazilian President Dilma Rousseff, to the list of those with whom our politicians should not be playing international poker.

In spite of all the endless insults targeting rich people by Barack Obama, and at Mitt Romney, by those pinheads who are morally outraged that Mrs. Romney has not one Cadillac, but two, in her garage, Forbes reported that a recent study of all our presidents proved that, far and away, our wealthiest chief executive was none other than George Washington. So if you’re going to start hurling invective at people for no better reason than their wealth, you will have to start with the Father of Our Country.

Speaking of Barack Obama, it’s worth noting that the same man who nixed the Keystone XL pipeline praised such New Deal construction projects as Hoover Dam and the Golden Gate Bridge in his State of the Union Address.

Now, seriously, is there anyone anywhere who actually believes that Obama would have gone ahead with such massive enterprises, risking the wrath of the environmental zealots who donate a ton of money to his re-election campaign?

Let’s face it, if they get this upset over a pipeline that would only run through states they fly over, can you imagine how those lunkheads would howl if the fish life of their beloved San Francisco Bay or the desert critters hanging out near their beloved Las Vegas suffered even the slightest upheaval for the sake of people who aren’t smart, rich or lucky enough to be them?
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To read another article by Burt Prelutsky, click here.
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