Thursday, May 3, 2012

Julia’s life of dependency and servitude

Julia’s life of dependency and servitude
Obama really has no idea how creepy he is.
by John Hayward
05/03/2012

Conservative humorist Iowahawk called it “perhaps the creepiest, skin-crawling propaganda ever produced for an American political campaign” on Twitter. Of course I had to read it right away. I love this stuff! To paraphrase Beetlejuice, I’ve seen The Prisoner about 167 times, and it keeps getting funnier every time.

What Iowahawk highlighted is the latest effusion of the Obama 2012 campaign website, which has already given the faithful a few ways to report their dissident neighbors, and offered to send taunting, divisive messages to the Republican in their lives at Christmastime. Now they’ve got “The Life of Julia,” a horrifying journey through a lifetime of dependency, servitude, and bankruptcy on a scale the world has never seen.

If you don’t feel like clicking the link to give the Obama campaign a website hit, it’s a cartoon chronology of a fictional middle-class white girl named Julia, born at the dawn of the Obama years, when the national debt was only $10 trillion dollars, and George Kaiser was having trouble finding investors for Solyndra. By scrolling through the slide show, we follow Julia through her lifetime, with each panel noting the wonderful Obama programs she will be dependent upon for success, if not survival.

Of course, if America swaps President Downgrade out for Willard Mitt Enrst Stavro Blofeld Warbucks Romney, he and his sidekicks, like Rep. Paul “Throw Grandma From the Cliff” Ryan, will pull out those Big Government feeding tubes, and Julia will find herself abandoned among the cruel harvesting machines of capitalism, beneath the scorched sun-blotting sky of limited government. Each panel is careful to note just how much of the money Obama took from other people to give Julia will be returned to its rightful owners by Romney.

Oddly, the Obama campaign forgot to include a couple of important milestones in the Life of Julia. She’s supposed to be three years old today. When she’s 8 years old, ObamaCare will probably drive Medicare into insolvency. If she’s lucky, Medicare will survive until she’s 17, but according to the latest report from the trustees, that’s the best-case scenario. Barack Obama, and most of his Party, will fight to the death to keep anyone from reforming Medicare in a way that would allow it to survive.

Social Security, meanwhile, will utterly collapse when Julia is 24, and busy racking up a gigantic student loan to pay the bloated tuition imposed by Obama’s friends in academia. She’ll need that college degree to learn all the things Obama’s masters in the teachers’ union didn’t teach her, during the years Obama fought like a demon to keep her trapped in a failing public school. God help her if she’s growing up in Washington, D.C.

The money Julia might have pumped into Social Security during her brief working life will not be returned to her. If she asks her parents why they allowed Barack Obama to raid Social Security funding to give them a tiny “payroll tax cut,” back when gas wasn’t even $10 per gallon yet, they’ll lower their eyes and shuffle their feet uncomfortably.

Julia will only be four years old when Taxmageddon hits her parents, dropping a fresh $4000 in taxes on their backs. Her child tax credit will be cut in half, her parents will resume paying a tax penalty for the privilege of remaining married, and if they own a small business, the Alternative Minimum Tax will come down on their heads like a sledgehammer. When Julia is old enough to ask her parents why they allowed this to happen, they’ll mutter something about the importance of blocking “tax cuts for the rich,” and the importance of re-electing Barack Obama, so he could make more “green energy” investments with their money.

Three-year-old Julia has lived her entire life without seeing the Democrat Party pass a budget for the federal government.

Our plucky heroine will just be entering grade school when Obama takes the national debt over $20 trillion dollars. The entire federal budget will be consumed by entitlement spending and interest on the national debt when she celebrates her “sweet sixteenth” birthday, so every government lollipop listed on the Obama 2012 website for Julia after age 16 is a blatant lie. Under Obama’s two terms, the U.S. government will pay the better part of $5 trillion in interest on the debt alone, as he remains on track to single-handedly double it.

According to the Congressional Budget Office, when Julia is 18 years old, the weight of Barack Obama’s debt will cause the entire national economy to shut down. When Obama’s Treasury Secretary, Tim Geithner, was informed of this by Rep. Paul Ryan, he laughed nervously and said, “We’re not coming before you to say we have a definitive solution to our long-term problem. What we do know is, we don’t like yours.”

That’s your true future under Obama, Julia! All of his hollow promises will vanish in a cloud of bankruptcy, right about the time you enter the workforce, and you’ll spend your life toiling to sustain a government that spends all of your money keeping promises to older people… promises it never should have made, and they never should have accepted. If you’re lucky to get one of the “burger flipper” jobs that represent over 40 percent of Obama’s job creation, just think of how much the government will be ripping out in taxes! Or maybe you’ll be unemployed, with time to attend an angry rally with your fellow dependents, where acolytes of Big Government teach you to despise the “greed” of anyone who proposes growth-oriented tax cuts.

The Obama campaign deserves a round of applause for creating a simple, concise, attractively illustrated Power Point presentation of the road to serfdom.

Update: On Twitter, people are pointing out that "Julia" was the name of the protagonist's doomed girlfriend in George Orwell's 1984. She starts out as an entusiastic Party propagandist, rebels, and is tortured back into obedience by the Party in the infamous "Room 101." In fact, it is implied that the Party may have lobotomized her. How utterly... perfect.
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To read another article by John Hayward, click here.
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To read more about "Julia", click here.

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