Was Idi Amin Smarter Than Martha Stewart?

Was Idi Amin Smarter Than Martha Stewart?
Thursday, January 19, 2012
by Burt Prelutsky

As I have stated in other articles, I hate the over-use of the word “alleged.” I understand that those in the media are compelled to use it, for fear of lawsuits, when referring to people who have been indicted but not convicted, lest the jury neglects to find the person guilty. But when it is readily apparent to one and all, except for the 12 goofballs in the jury box, that, say, O.J. Simpson or Casey Anthony is guilty as sin, couldn’t the TV reporter at least wink or giggle when using the word? It would be a way of letting us know that they know that it isn’t the defendant’s guilt that should be called into question, but, rather, the sanity and commonsense of the jurors.

I suppose that carried to its extreme, Obama’s biographer will one day write that he was allegedly born in Hawaii, allegedly received good grades in college and was allegedly heterosexual, even though no woman, in spite of the fame and fortune awaiting her, has ever come forward to say that she dated him prior to his marrying Michelle when he was 31.

Speaking of people who should, by all rights, be going to jail, perhaps to share a cell with Bernie Madoff, there was Jon Corzine, the former governor and senator from New Jersey, being questioned by a congressional committee about $1.2 billion of MF Global customers’ money that’s gone missing. Mr. Corzine, who had already told a reporter that he had no intention of using any of his fortune to pay back bilked investors, sat at a table, insisting that even though he had been the head of the company, he had no idea where the money had gone. That part was all too predictable. What threw me is that this Jersey sleaze ball, this friend and confidant of Obama and Biden, got to perch behind a little sign identifying him as The Honorable Jon S. Corzine.

Now, first of all, I suspect the various politicians on the committee already knew his name. After all, they were the ones who had subpoenaed him. But how is that none of them commented on the fact that referring to this jackass as honorable was as laughable as putting a top hat on a pig. Wouldn’t you think that the sign might at least have read The Allegedly Honorable Jon S. Corzine?

Finally, what is it with some people that compel them to take entirely unnecessary risks? I’m not just referring to those who climb mountains, bungee-jump or, worse yet, run for president when they must know that their worst, most embarrassing, secrets will inevitably be splashed all over the media, scarring their wives and children?

The folks I actually have in mind are those people who are given ample opportunity to avoid scandal, jail and even death, but decide to roll the dice and take their chances. For instance, when the prosecutors offered the fabulously wealthy Martha Stewart the opportunity to avoid jail time if she’d merely admit she’d saved herself some dough by taking advantage of insider information, why did she insist on going to trial? For one thing, it’s not as if she couldn’t have afforded to take the stock loss by ignoring the information she received in the phone call from a friend. For another, I’m sure her defense lawyers wound up costing her more than the $150,000 or so she’d saved by selling off earlier than the other, outside-the-loop, stockholders.

For that matter, why didn’t Saddam Hussein, Hosni Mubarak and Muammar Gaddafi, all get out while the getting was good, and spend their golden years enjoying freedom and their ill-gotten gains?

If I were any of them, the worst part about ending up dead or in an Egyptian cage, would have been the realization that I was even dumber than a psychotic gorilla like Idi Amin, who wisely scampered off to Saudi Arabia, and, as a result, got to spend his last 24 years living the life of Riley.
________________________________________

To read another article by Burt Prelutsky, click here.